Two Thugs on a Picnic

Teon: Time to go, nigga.

Dawup:  Oh, but it so comfortable here, nigga. And look, nigga–I spread out my things n shit.

(Beep!)

Teon: The neighbors be beeping their car alarms at us, nigga. Next it’s the po-po, nigga. You want the rest of that fruit salad, nigga?

Dawup: Nigga, fuck a po-po, nigga, f’real. Nothin incriminating on me but the color of my skin–

Teon: Nigga, you bout to find out that’s enough out here, nigga.

Dawup:  Bring em the fuck on then, nigga, f’real. I’m clean, nigga. You can have the tato salad but I gotta keep the fruit salad to return the tupperware, nigga, unless you want to eat it now.

Teon: I’m too full to eat it now, nigga. But nigga, clean, nigga? Motherfuckin’ clean these nuts, nigga. What’s your issue with not being criminal? Nigga, you don’t even know what I’m packin, nigga.

Dawup: I see you packin the cupcakes in the basket, nigga, and I didn’t even get one. But fuck it, nigga, you got warrants and shit, I’ll bounce wich you, nigga.

Teon: Nigga, I just don’t know why you so clean, nigga. Cuz I don’t need no narc or snitch ridin longside, nigga, feel me, nigga?

Dawup: Shit, nigga. See ya later, then. Peace.

Teon: Naw, it ain’t like that, nigga. …OH, IT LIKE THAT, NIGGA?

Dawup: Nigga, I still want that bubbly mint and melon drink recipe and shit, nigga. But you bouncin’, then yeah, nigga, bye. Peace out.

Teon: Call me, nigga.

Dawup: I’ll call you nigga, nigga. And I’ll text you, nigga.

Teon: A’ight then.

Dawup: A’ight, nigga.

Exit Teon.

 

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